SO YOU THINK YOU'VE GOT MALE?
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When the world went on a
`celebrate' International Men's Day mode yesterday, a girl gang picked
out the 10 most irritating habits in men
CHATTING UP WOMEN YOUR EX ISN'T COOL
Whether it's that new intern at office, the neighbour's daughter or
your string of exes -you can't stop chatting them up, can you? And your
favourite excuse is, “I was just being nice!“ But if we were to look
even sideways at our exes, you aren't the same man we dated for years!
Let's get this straight: we don't care if your jaw drops when you're
eyeing women all by yourself. Hell, we do that too.But when you're
around your girlfriendwife, we want you to keep your roving eyes screwed
right on her.
STOP BORING US WITH THOSE `I HAD THE HOTS FOR MY TEACHER' STORIES
Chemistry, Biology, Physics, English -we all know your attendance records in class. The marksheets are an entirely different story though. But then, who needs to know about atoms when the teacher is a bomb? Frankly, we've heard these teen-in-heat stories umpteen times and it's time you put a lid on it.After all, you don't want us to start on our `hot teacher' stories!
NO HAIR ON THE BATHING BAR, PLEASE!
Women who live with a male figure (brother, father, friend, partner, husband) raise your hands! Boys and men, this one act gets you the title of Perpetual King of Ewwdom. Shedding hair is not a problem; we do it too.But to add a layer of loofah to the bathing bar because you're sloppy and have bad bathroom habits is just not on.
GET YOUR OWN SHEET TO BED
Stop clawing at my sheet at night.If you feel cold, you should know to grab a blanket for yourself before you jump into bed. We could do without waking up shivering in the middle of the night because you've happily hogged ours! Yes, we know that it's warm and cozy together under a single blanket and it provides various other opportunities too. But when the deed is done and sleep comes calling, can't you spare me my share of warmth?
SHOULD WE EVEN START ABOUT THE TOILET SEAT PROBLEM?
Seriously, should we? Does it kill you to let the toilet seat down? But then, if you did, it would amount to showing consideration for other people. And alpha male that you are, being thoughtful and considerate isn't really your game. It's -whatyoucallit -feminine, along with fear, pity, sorrow and basically any other emotion that requires you to have more feelings than an amoeba. Come on, when did the pride's biggest lion care for anything more than his pound of flesh?
SMILE WHEN YOU'RE IN THE SAME FRAME AS US
Our lovey-dovey selfie has you staring at the camera, the anniversary photo has you glancing sideways, the dineout picture has you staring at the food. Honestly, will it kill you to smile for a picture with us? We don't hold you at gunpoint to be in the same frame, do we?
Then stop frowning and give us a big smile for our selfie. And we promise not to tell anyone about your photo wearing Donald Duck inners.
DON'T PRETEND TO KNOW EVERY SPORT IN THE WORLD
You never fail to remind us how you were the cricket captain in school. Or the soccer champ, the TT maestro, the book cricket baron... er, the pocket billiards mogul.Forget volleyball, badminton or tennis, if you tell us you've won glory in Phasketboot, Chess Boxing, Pooh Sticks, Sepak Takraw and Basque Pelota we'll believe that too. But just so you know, the next time you start uttering, “You don't know this game?“ we'll start Gurning. Wazzat? It's the world contest for pulling faces. So there!
STOP SAYING YOUR MOM COOKS BEST
Next time you say that, we'll put mirchi in your coffee.
We swear. We might spend hours labouring in the kitchen because you feel like spaghetti bolognese for dinner, but trust you to polish it off, burp and then say that ma ke haath ka khana is always better.
Well, little one, if you miss ma -and her cooking -so much, it's time you went back to holding her pallu and asking for directions in life. PS: DEAR MARTIANS, WE STILL LOVE YOU!
STOP BORING US WITH THOSE `I HAD THE HOTS FOR MY TEACHER' STORIES
Chemistry, Biology, Physics, English -we all know your attendance records in class. The marksheets are an entirely different story though. But then, who needs to know about atoms when the teacher is a bomb? Frankly, we've heard these teen-in-heat stories umpteen times and it's time you put a lid on it.After all, you don't want us to start on our `hot teacher' stories!
NO HAIR ON THE BATHING BAR, PLEASE!
Women who live with a male figure (brother, father, friend, partner, husband) raise your hands! Boys and men, this one act gets you the title of Perpetual King of Ewwdom. Shedding hair is not a problem; we do it too.But to add a layer of loofah to the bathing bar because you're sloppy and have bad bathroom habits is just not on.
GET YOUR OWN SHEET TO BED
Stop clawing at my sheet at night.If you feel cold, you should know to grab a blanket for yourself before you jump into bed. We could do without waking up shivering in the middle of the night because you've happily hogged ours! Yes, we know that it's warm and cozy together under a single blanket and it provides various other opportunities too. But when the deed is done and sleep comes calling, can't you spare me my share of warmth?
SHOULD WE EVEN START ABOUT THE TOILET SEAT PROBLEM?
Seriously, should we? Does it kill you to let the toilet seat down? But then, if you did, it would amount to showing consideration for other people. And alpha male that you are, being thoughtful and considerate isn't really your game. It's -whatyoucallit -feminine, along with fear, pity, sorrow and basically any other emotion that requires you to have more feelings than an amoeba. Come on, when did the pride's biggest lion care for anything more than his pound of flesh?
SMILE WHEN YOU'RE IN THE SAME FRAME AS US
Our lovey-dovey selfie has you staring at the camera, the anniversary photo has you glancing sideways, the dineout picture has you staring at the food. Honestly, will it kill you to smile for a picture with us? We don't hold you at gunpoint to be in the same frame, do we?
Then stop frowning and give us a big smile for our selfie. And we promise not to tell anyone about your photo wearing Donald Duck inners.
DON'T PRETEND TO KNOW EVERY SPORT IN THE WORLD
You never fail to remind us how you were the cricket captain in school. Or the soccer champ, the TT maestro, the book cricket baron... er, the pocket billiards mogul.Forget volleyball, badminton or tennis, if you tell us you've won glory in Phasketboot, Chess Boxing, Pooh Sticks, Sepak Takraw and Basque Pelota we'll believe that too. But just so you know, the next time you start uttering, “You don't know this game?“ we'll start Gurning. Wazzat? It's the world contest for pulling faces. So there!
STOP SAYING YOUR MOM COOKS BEST
Next time you say that, we'll put mirchi in your coffee.
We swear. We might spend hours labouring in the kitchen because you feel like spaghetti bolognese for dinner, but trust you to polish it off, burp and then say that ma ke haath ka khana is always better.
Well, little one, if you miss ma -and her cooking -so much, it's time you went back to holding her pallu and asking for directions in life. PS: DEAR MARTIANS, WE STILL LOVE YOU!
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