Saturday Sept. 17: Watched Dracula: Dead and loving it. I think Mel Brooks was depressed.
Sunday Sept. 18: Stayed in bed till noon waiting for an earthquake. Nothing happened.
Monday Sept. 19: No autos plying. Scores of them were parked on the roads; drivers looked happy reading the papers and gossiping. One of them growled at me when I asked what was going on. I scrutinised his face and body language for textbook signs of a zombie epidemic; found none. Surrounded by hapless people looking for autos, I figured what had happened: a flash strike by autos protesting against the crackdown on faulty meters. Walked for half an hour; the situation depressed me. I simply could not get myself to get on a bus.
Tuesday Sept. 20: Had a weird dream last night. I am waiting outside a school in Juhu. There is no one besides me but I do not find it unusual. I am waiting for children to storm out of the building any minute. I am not sure if I am waiting for a particular child but I am certain I am waiting for the school to get over. A bell rings. No children come out. Instead, autos rush towards me from the other side of the school gate. I panic. Suddenly a number of men and women appear around me and start haggling with the auto drivers as the autos come out of the school. Seeing the crowd, I suddenly want to get inside an auto. But by the time I make up my mind everyone has left. I am alone. I look at the school again. It is empty. I feel sad.
A bell rings. This time a solitary auto appears. I think I recognise the auto driver but I cannot be sure. A number of children are following the auto. As the auto comes closer I hear the cries of the children. I recall telling myself that an entire class seems to be following the auto. The driver is pedalling the auto like a moped. I find it strange. The auto comes out of the school gate but the children stay at the open gates; it seems they don't have permission to go beyond the gate. Their cries are deafening. I cannot bear to see the children cry; I hope the auto driver pedals faster and takes me somewhere.
Then, I recognise the driver: Anna Hazare. I am shocked. I start sweating. I call Anna but he doesn't stop. As the auto moves past I notice there is no place to sit in the passenger seat: it is packed with children's tiffin boxes. Anna pedals away. I run after him. But I can't match him. He's gone. I am tired when I get back to the school gate. I am immediately surrounded by children. They have been waiting, it appears; they look angry. I wonder whatever happened to their discipline of staying at the gate. I find myself pinned to the ground. One by one, each of them turns into a vulture. When the first one goes for my eye, I think, I wake up.
Called up a friendly doctor and narrated the dream. She suspects I have gas issues. I think she suspects I have a thing for her. Perhaps I should ask her to see a Rs1500/hour therapist. She'll know what gas issues are like.
Wednesday Sept. 21: There is a conspiracy; trust me. Did you see Facebook?
Thursday Sept. 22: Woke up feeling like killing myself. What will happen? I won't be able to do it. So what? They'll arrest me for trying to attempt suicide? Let them. I shall fight for my right to die. Oh man! I told you there was a conspiracy. Just read the papers: the government is considering tweaking Article 309 of the Indian penal code: a law that criminalises a failed suicide attempt. Double dip depression. Help me, God. No, don't. I know you aren't there.
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